I did it my way.... not.

It will be December already tomorrow and before I know it, it is already the Year 2006.

Right now, a myriad of thoughts are going through my head. A lot of whys, whats and hows. I have never been so unsure in my life. I feel lost as to what I would really want to do with this so-called life of mine. I want to be carefree and living one day at a time but I can't stop worrying about the future. Yeah, I do worry about the future. Although I may not look it, I do care. I am scared of what the future holds for me cos right now I feel very pessimistic about it.

Another year has passed and I haven't done anything that's relevant to human existence. I remain to be such an insignificant homo sapien en la tierra. Of course, I am not expecting much from myself but I also want to stop living a mediocre life. I fear I am forever doomed to remain in this state of mediocrity and inertness. To reiterate and give emphasis to my discontentment, I just want to say that I feel life is not short. It is but a long, meaningless journey towards nothingness. I would be much happier if it was much shorter.

I hate the feeling of uncertainty. Hate hate hate.