2015 Reading Challenge: Me Before You

via Goodreads

Just a few hours away from Valentine's Day and I am here stuck at home silently crying from what I just read. Wow. That was one depressing yet beautiful story. It's been quite a while since I last read something like it.

Funny that I almost didn't read this book because I thought it was too dismal for me and my mood nowadays which is a little unstable, so to speak. Hah. But I reckon I needed a little deviation from my usual YA reads. (Yes, reckon talaga. In keeping with the book's English vibe). A love story still because it's the month of loooove after all ☺

I loved it. I loved the story. I loved all the characters- no exception. I loved Lou and even though I see her as somewhat a manic-pixie-dream-girl-ish type (characters I am not really very fond of), I have endeared myself to her. Even if life didn't offer her much, she didn't act the part of a victim. Well, she did stay in that teeny tiny space because her sister and nephew needed more space and I don't see that as Lou being a pushover. Just goes to show that she's very considerate. Will, on the other hand, was someone who, at first, wasn't very likable but maybe because he really was being a difficult person. Frustration can do that to a person; what more to Will who had access to everything and anything given his wealth and good looks (well, good looks can get you far in life).

All the time, while I was reading the book- I kept on waiting where the love story would kick in. It wasn't until almost the end of the book that it was spelled for us. At first I thought Will has just grown fond of Louisa because I think it is possible for a person to be fond of another without romantic feelings attached. Ditto in Lou's case. Just like Will and Nathan's relationship. But towards the end, we witness how their feelings have subtly evolved into something beautiful.

To cut the long story short, Will's this quadriplegic guy who wants to die via assisted suicide. He promised his parents six months. This is where Louisa steps in- she was hired by the family as Will's carer- they needed someone bubbly and optimistic, someone who could change Will's mind. I wanted Will to change his mind but at the same I was thinking that he wouldn't because that would be so predictable and too fairy tale-ish.

At the end, I wasn't exactly ugly crying- it was actually more subdued than when I was crying over Eleanor & Park- but man, that was some heavy stuff.

Kawawang Louisa. She just took the job because at that time she just wanted to have a job and this job paid lots of moolah but she ends up brokenhearted. I mean, how do you get over that? Now I understand why Mrs. Traynor always wears that pinched expression on her face. I mean, how can you let someone you love do that to himself. In the end, as Will said, it was still his decision to make.

There was nothing left for me to do. Do you know how hard it is to say nothing?
When every atom of you strains to do the opposite? 

I do think it was selfish of Will to subject his loved ones to such an ordeal. But then again it was also selfish of Mrs. Traynor, Louisa and the others to also impose on Will when he clearly doesn't want to go on. Tama si Louisa for being angry, for asking Will that if he really loves her, 'isn't she enough?' for him to want to keep on living?

And finally, my head pressed into the pillow, I cried, because my lifesuddenly seemed so much darker and more complicated than I could ever haveimagined, and I wished I could go back, back to when my biggest worry was whether Frank and I had ordered in enough Chelsea buns.

Eto ang book na talagang "all the feels." If ever they make this into a movie, I think I wouldn't want to watch it. Masakit sa puso. But man, that was beautiful. Five stars.

P.S. Wait lang. I need a pick-me-upper. Sinimulan to ng If I Die video ng mga shortlisted volunteers who want to go to Mars. Sinundan ng Gravity kanina. I feel sad. I need to watch The DUFF already!!!